Conflict Resolution
For young people
For youth worker/volunteer training
Communication breakdown
Aim: Define and commit to common rules to
guarantee a maximum level
of participation in
the group.
Material: Paper, pens and space
Duration: 30 Minutes
- In small working groups the participants collect 10 actions/behaviours they judge most contributory to a communication breakdown and visualize them on a sheet.
- From these possibilities they select the 3 best' ones in a ranking order. The best one should be represented in a living statue (body sculpture) for presentation in plenary, yet it should not be named.(20-30 minutes)
- Every group reports on it results and presents the human sculpture. The other participants have to interpret it.
- From this pool of destructive behaviours, participants and trainers can create a set of rules for group communication and discuss individual commitment to them.
- Some other issues for discussion in this manner could be:
-
- Mutual respect
- Smoking and non-smoking
- Alcohol and closing time of the bar'.
- Noise levels in the evening
- Absence from the training
Letter to an Alien: Conflict is......?
A large group exercise exploring the meaning of the word
conflict, aiming to clarify what we mean by conflict; to discover
the range of responses within the group; and to work towards a
group definition of conflict.
Step-by-step description:
- Divide a large sheet of paper into columns, each headed by a letter of the alphabet. For the purposes of this exercise choose letters A to H
- Ask participants individually to brainstorm conflict words. Each should try to provide at least one word for each letter (for example A-anger, B-broken…). A nominated scribe can write down the words as they are called out, or each individual participant can simply add them to the chart. There is no debate or questioning at this stage about why certain words have been chosen. (5 minutes)
- Once the chart is completed (it’s good to have a strict time limit), people can ask each other questions about their chosen words – what certain words mean, how they are connected with conflict, and so forth. But no judgments are to be passed. (3 minutes)
- Participants split into pairs or groups of three and select a letter from the chart. (It is best if each pair or group has a different letter). They then draft a short communication to an extraterrestrial alien who has never heard of conflict, explaining what it is. Each group should use the words listed under their letter. The communications are then shared with the whole group. (10 minutes)
- Mixing participants into new groups of four or five, ask each group to create a brief definition of conflict in the form of a slogan. These could all start with ‘Conflict is …’. Then let each group try to think of an imaginative way to present their definition. They could use tableaux, involving everyone in the presentation. Extra time will be needed if a presentation is to be prepared. (10 minutes)
Reflection and evaluation:
Back in the whole group, participants are invited to reflect
individually on their experience of interaction between group
members.
- How did the group draft its letter to the alien?
- How did the group agree upon its definition? (Were they surprised by anyone else’s definition?).
- Was it easy to get to a slogan on conflict?
There are other questions that might be asked.
- Have they learnt anything about conflict from this exercise?
- Are they clearer now?
- Do they feel that any crucial aspect has been missed out?
Chain Argument
This activity comes with a warning! Although it offers young
people a forum to experience controlled arguments and compliments
in equal measure you need to be very careful at setting and
maintaining boundaries so that it does not become an opportunity
for destructive comments and bullying.
The aim is to encourage the young people to reflect on the
process that leads to conflict and also that which produces
compliments. The idea is for the young people to decide whether it
is easier to criticise others or see their good points. There is no
wrong or right answer as it is personal and up for discussion
Step-by-step description:
- Designate an area as a ‘stage’. Explain to the group that the object of the activity is to experience conflict and compliments and then discuss what feels the most comfortable to give and receive. Try to give an idea of the exercise without giving too much away to avoid the group become reserved about what they do.
- Set some group rules with the group:
-
- That any conversation that takes place ends when the young person comes off stage.
- That any argument started must be abstract and not a continuation of any outside grievance or vendetta!
- That only two people can be on stage at any time and the dialogue only takes place for as long as they want – at any time they can withdraw and the next person has a go.
- That if the experience becomes uncomfortable at any time the group stops and reviews what is going on.They can then add to these if they wish.
- Invite two members of the group to begin. Explain that one young person should stand on the stage while the next one approaches them and begins an argument. If there is reluctance or uncertainty about doing this, demonstrate what you mean by starting off the process with your co-worker. Be sure to make it clear that this should not be too personal. A good example is to begin with something that may be emotive but not too sensitive: ‘So why do you support [name of well-known football team] then, they’re rubbish?’. You should then carry on until one person has had enough and leaves the stage.
- The next person joins the remaining group member on the stage and begins a new argument.
- If at any time it seems to be getting too personal – stop!
- When everybody has had a chance to participate, ask the group to start the process again, only this time instead of picking an argument, they need to compliment them or say something positive about them. Once again, this will need to be managed carefully.
Reflection and evaluation:
At the end of the process, discuss with the young people how
they felt.
- What was easier – arguing or complimenting?
- What felt the most comfortable – the giving or receiving of either?
- Remember to stress that there is no right or wrong here.
- You may be surprised at the answers!
Cage debating
Step by step description:
- Create a 'cage', a boxing ring, by marking an area of approx. 4 sq.m. with the rope. Divide the group in two. Three people from the facilitating team will be the jury and sit at a table in front of the 'cage'.
- The two groups are standing on the left and right side of the table.
- Explain the rules: the chairman of the jury will read out a statement, one of the contestants will defend this statement, and the other will be opposed to it.
- The way of handling the subject is up to the contestants; but you might get bonus points for making people laugh.
- Every 'fight' (the contestants are not allowed to touch each other, they may only speak, not scream or shout) lasts for two minutes maximum; a contestant can give in before the two minutes are over.
- The game is also finished when one of the contestants can't reply within 10 seconds.
- The judges decides on the points; they can distribute four points for each game, but can decide by themselves how these points are divided
- One person from every group is invited to enter the cage. One of the facilitators reads out the statement, the whistle is blown and the stopwatch starts counting.
- One of the contestants than opens the fight by taking either sides, and waits for a reply. If this reply doesn't come fast enough, he can add arguments to this, but his opponent should have a chance to talk.
- After two minutes (or earlier in case of a K.O., the whistle gets blown again and the jury deliberates on the points for each team.
- No discussion is held at that time, but the next to contestants are invited into the cage.
- When all participants have been in the cage at least once, the jury ends the contest and points out the winner. Then, a discussion follows, using (some of the) questions at the 'reflection and evaluation’ section.
Reflection and evaluation:
- how did you feel when someone of your group won?
- do you think the judging was done fairly? How did you feel about the way of judging?
- what do you think of using humour in a serious discussion?
- how did you experience the time pressure?
- do you think this is a good way of discussing subjects?
- did you have the feeling you were in a group, or did the 'battle' feel more like an individual fight?
- did people react to the statements you made?
- was it hard to defend a statement you actually didn't agree on, because you were forced to take that side?
Comments:
This method has been tried out on both national as
international meetings, and often led to surprising results; an
eloquent speaker who was always first to talk and to cut off all
discussion was baffled by an opponent who all of a sudden decided
to hold his defence in Chinese, thereby winning on
laughing-decibels, a loosing group tried to bribe the jury and
successfully managed to do so with one of the members - which
didn't keep them from loosing by the way.
Material needed: approx. 8 meters of rope or marking tape
* whistle
* stopwatch
* blackboard/flipchart for keeping the
score on
* marker
* list of statements depending on the
subject you're dealing with
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For Youth Workers/ Volunteer Training
The following session is an introduction to anger management and coping with aggressive situations.
This is a complex and specialised area, but this training gives a base understanding and guidelines on how to work with young people in potentially difficult situations.
Step-by-step description:
That makes me so angry! (20 minutes)
- This warm-up game opens the training session by recognising that anger is an emotion that we all feel
- Everyone get angry if a situation triggers a certain feeling or thought. This can be as a direct response to what has happened or a reaction due to a previous experience.
- The volunteers will begin to reflect on the difference in
personal triggers by reviewing the answers shared within the
group.
- Explain to the group that you are going to read out a series
of situations that may or may not make them feel
angry.
- Introduce the two sides of the room with the
‘ANGRY’ and ‘NOT ANGRY’ cards and ask the
volunteers to move towards the area that most represents their
feelings.
- Encourage the group to be honest with their reactions. Reinforce the point that anger is an emotion as valid as any other, and that we all have a right to feel anger at certain situations.
- As the activity progresses, review the process with the group.
- Why does a certain situation provoke
anger?
- Are there commonalties? For example, do the majority of the group become angered by rudeness or disrespect?
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Recognising the signs (30
minutes)
- Divide the group into two groups and ask for a note taker and spokesperson to be nominated from each group.
- The task is for each group to list ten physical symptoms that are recognisable as the body’s expression of anger.
- Prompt points:
-
- Red face
- Sweaty palms
- Pointing finger
- Invading personal space
- Shouting/swearing
- Invite the two groups to join together and each spokesperson to share the points that have been made within their group.
- Encourage the group to discuss the symptoms listed.
-
- How easy was it to contribute to the list?
- Are these feelings familiar to the group?
- Ask the group to consider how easy it will be to recognise the signs of anger in young people.
Resolving conflict (20 minutes)
Introduce the idea that to resolve conflict in a potentially
difficult situation you need to:
- 1. Recognise the signs – step back from the young person and make sure you are not invading their space. Try and position yourself nearer the door and do not allow yourself to be blocked in.
- 2. Listen – listen carefully to what is being said and try not to butt in with your own opinions or recollections.
- 3. Reflect – reflect back what the young person is saying to show that you understand. Clarify facts and ask additional questions to diffuse anger and encourage the young person to explain what is wrong.
- 4. Resolve – Agree a specific solution or action with the young person. It may not change the situation much but it will make them feel that something is being done. It also helps the young person to take control of the situation and the solution themselves.
- 5. If these fail you need to move yourself to the safest place.Make sure that your volunteers are quite clear that you are not asking them to place themselves in danger or physically tackle aggressive young people. This session is about recognising the signs and trying to diffuse the situation and, if all else fails, getting away. Additionally you can stress that as volunteers they have not given up their human rights to be safe and protected – if they are in a situation that is escalating out of control make sure people know the number for the local police and the project manager on duty.
In practice (1 hour 30 minutes)
Introduce the idea of working through potentially difficult
situations using role-play.
The aim of this is to build confidence and have an
opportunity to put into practice new skills in a safe environment.
- Divide your volunteers into groups of four. Two will be volunteer youth workers and two will become young people they are trying to engage.
- Hand out a similar paragraph to each group.
- Allow 30 minutes for the role-play to develop, encouraging the young people to give the volunteer youth workers as hard a time as possible!
- When you can see that they have nearly exhausted the role-play, ask the volunteers to come out of character and in the smaller groups work through the following questions.
-
- What is making the young person angry?
- Is it direct or indirect anger?
- Is it possible to resolve the conflict?
- Write up an action plan to diffuse the situation.
- Finally ask the group to come together again to share their action plans.
Question and support the groups in challenging each other.
Prompt points:
- How easy was it to maintain your position?
- Could you empathise with the young person’s point of view?
- How frustrated did you feel?
- Did you manage to agree a conflict resolution?
Staying safe (20 minutes)
In large group devise safety guidelines for managing
angry/aggressive behaviour.
Prompt points:
- Listen to what the young person is saying.
- Look carefully at body language.
- Assess danger to yourself and others using the project.
- Act – resolve the situation or move away.
Material needed
- Flipchart paper
- Marker pens
- Copies of anger role play cards